Self-doubt in Autism: How to Overcome a Lack of self-confidence

Self-doubt is something many people experience. But self-doubt in Autism is especially common, especially those who are undiagnosed or late diagnosed. It can become deeply rooted and constant. This is often to the point of second-guessing every thought, feeling, or decision you make.


The connection between Autism and Self-Doubt


Autism and self-doubt are often linked because:

  • You may have grown up feeling “different” without knowing why
  • Your natural responses may have been criticised, misunderstood, or labelled as wrong
  • You’ve learned to mask, monitor, or question yourself constantly just to fit in
  • You may find it difficult to trust your instincts, especially in social or emotional situations

This self-doubt isn’t a flaw – it’s a survival strategy that’s been overused.


You might recognise autism-related self-doubt if you:

  • Rehearse conversations or replay them in your head after they’ve happened
  • Constantly ask others for reassurance, even when you know the answer
  • Feel unsure if your emotions are “valid” or “too much”
  • Struggle to make decisions — even small ones — because you’re scared of getting it wrong
  • Automatically assume you’re the problem in relationships or conflicts
  • Feel like your thoughts, preferences, or needs are inconvenient
  • Mask so often that you’re not sure what’s “you” anymore

This isn’t because you’re not capable. It’s because you’ve spent years taking in the message that your brain works ‘wrong’. This means that self-doubt isn’t necessarily a symptom of Autism, but a result of the environment around you.


Impact Self-Doubt in Autism has on Daily Life

You might avoid taking risks, speaking up, or setting boundaries

Relationships may feel one-sided or draining because you’re always people-pleasing

You might push yourself to burnout just to meet other people’s expectations

You could feel stuck, disconnected, or unsure of who you really are underneath the masking

Everyday decisions might feel exhausting or paralysing

This isn’t about being indecisive or insecure — it’s about living in a world that’s made you question your worth.


How to overcome self-doubt in autism

We work with autistic and high-masking neurodivergent adults who are tired of second-guessing everything.

We help you:

  • Untangle where your self-doubt is coming from
  • Build trust in your own instincts, preferences, and emotional responses
  • Learn how to spot and interrupt the internalised stories that tell you you’re “too much” or “not enough”
  • Feel more confident setting boundaries, saying no, or just existing without explanation
  • Work towards a version of life that feels like yours — not one that’s shaped entirely by masking and people-pleasing

You don’t need to be fixed. You don’t need to try harder. You need space to reconnect with yourself — and we can help you get there.

Reach out if this resonates. We’re ready when you are.

What Self-doubt in Autism therapy will focus on:

– Understanding how Autism and past experiences have shaped your relationship with self-doubt.

– Exploring how perfectionism, fear of failure, and RSD show up and how to manage these.

– Rebuilding self-trust through compassionate, practical strategies.

– Helping you identify your needs, strengths, and sensory profile.

– Learning how to take action without waiting to feel 100% confident first.

Here’s what you’ll achieve:

– Greater self-trust and emotional resilience.

– Confidence in your own voice, decisions, and boundaries.

– Tools to manage procrastination, people-pleasing, and overwhelm.

– The ability to stop over-apologising and start advocating for yourself.

– A version of self-worth that isn’t based on productivity.

We offer therapy that’s ADHD-informed, validating, and tailored to you – not some generic motivational advice you’ve probably tried a hundred times.

Let’s unpick the self-doubt, together.

Frequently Asked Questions

Find out more about working with F&B Digital Therapy

  • Do i need to have a diagnosis to work with you?

    No – we work with all neurodiversity, whether thats a diagnosed condition, a suspected one or neither! Therapy can help you decide whether you would like to pursue a diagnostic assessment. 

  • What is different about your approach compared to other therapists?

    We have lived experience of what its like to be neurodivergent in therapy – we know that without adaptions, therapy can often be unhelpful and sometimes even harmful. We therefore offer a tailored approach, adapting research based techniques in a way that fits with how your individual brain works. We also have first hand experience of what its like to be undiagnosed in a world that wasn’t made to embrace neurodiversity, so when we say we understand we TRULY understand. 

  • Does cbt work for Autism?

    Yes! Many people with Autism benefit from CBT. CBT isn’t a cure for Autism, but it can address the mental health difficulties that come alongside this. CBT can help build confidence in being yourself, alongside understanding yourself and managing difficult symptoms. 

  • Does Cognitive Behavioural Therapy work for ADHD?

    Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) can be life changing for someone with ADHD, providing the sessions are adapted to take into account potential challenges and utilise strengths of an individual. At F&B Digital therapy we therefore work as a team with you, we have the knowledge of CBT and neurodivergence, you have the knowledge of yourself! Examples of how we can adapt sessions include: making in between session tasks fun, shorter or longer appointments, a choice of text, telephone or video, fidget toys in session, written summaries or recordings for each session. 

  • How long does therapy last?

    Official guidelines offer different recommendations on number of sessions depending on what your main problem is. This typically ranges anywhere up to 12-20 sessions for one presenting problem. However, this is often based on short term focused therapy models, such as those seen in the NHS. At F&B Digital therapy, we’re able to be a lot more flexible! We can work with you up until a point the sessions are no longer useful and we can address multiple problems over a longer period of time if needed. 

  • How do I prepare for my first therapy session?

    You don’t need to prepare, its very normal to be nervous at your first session (and your therapy may even be a bit nervous to meet you too!). The first session will most likely be assessment based. Your therapist will guide the session and ask you questions to get to know you better. You don’t need to get it all perfectly right and you don’t need to remember everything at this stage. Some people however may like to write some notes, which could include an overview of your main problems and what you’d like to get from therapy. 

  • What is CBT therapy?

    CBT stands for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. This is a type of therapy that helps you understand and change negative cycles keeping you stuck in difficult places in your life. You can find out more about CBT here.  

  • How do i pay for sessions?

    You’ll be provided with details of how to pay when you book your session. We accept bank transfers and online card payment. Payment is required at least 48 hours before your appointment to secure it. We offer block bookings at a discounted rate if this is preferred. 

  • How much is private therapy in the UK?

    Private therapy costs accross the UK vary depending on many different things. At F&B Digital therapy, our costs are based on our specialist training and experience. Prices currently range from £60-£80 per session. You can find more details about our fees here.  

  • What if i can’t afford session fees?

    We understand sessions aren’t affordable for everyone. We offer discounts for students, NHS workers and those over 60 years old. We’re also working on a number of more affordable alternatives to access support from ourselves. 

  • How long does therapy last?

    Official guidelines offer different recommendations on number of sessions depending on what your main problem is. This typically ranges anywhere up to 12-20 sessions for one presenting problem. However, this is often based on short term focused therapy models, such as those seen in the NHS. At F&B Digital therapy, we’re able to be a lot more flexible! We can work with you up until a point the sessions are no longer useful and we can address multiple problems over a longer period of time if needed. 

  • Can I have a face to face appointment?

    F&B Digital therapy don’t offer face to face appointments currently and all appointments are remote. However, research shows no difference in therapy outcome in remote therapy compared to face to face therapy. In fact, we find a lot of neurodivergent people do better with remote sessions! 

  • Can I access Therapy with you if I don’t live in the uk?

    Anyone can access F&B Digital Therapy’s services from all over the world. However, due to insurance restrictions we’re unable to offer 1-1 therapy sessions to anyone in the USA or Canada. 

  • Do you only offer text therapy?

    F&B Digital Therapy offers 1-1 text, telephone and video options for therapy. 

Frequently Asked Questions about ADHD & Self-Doubt

  • I’ve tried therapy for self-doubt before and it didn’t help – how is this different?

    Many of our clients say the same. But when neurodiversity isn’t accounted for in therapy, this can lead to poor experiences and reinforce shame & self-doubt. We’re neuro-affirming therapists and neurodivergent ourselves! Which means we don’t pathologise the way your brain works. We understand what its like to feel the way you do, so you don’t have to explain the parts of your ADHD that might not make sense. Instead we can spend more time on what matters – helping you understand how your ADHD experiences have shaped your self-doubt, and what to do about it. But we do this in a way that works for you and embraces your personal strengths. 

  • Can self-doubt really be unlearned? I’ve felt this way forever.

    Yes, you can learn how to manage self-doubt in ADHD – but not overnight. We use compassionate, structured approaches to help you rebuild self-trust slowly, in ways that feel real and doable. It’s not about becoming confident all the time, but more about learning how to stop listening to the self-doubt when it shows up. 

  • What if I don’t have a formal ADHD diagnosis?

    That’s completely okay. We specialise in all types of self-doubt and low self-esteem. We work with lots of people who are exploring whether they’re neurodivergent or who feel like the ADHD label explains their experience. You don’t need a diagnosis to access support. 

  • Is my self-doubt ADHD related or part of who I am?

    Self-doubt is linked to ADHD when your inner critic feels loud, especially around tasks, decisions, or speaking up, and that’s been present since childhood or worsens under stress. In this case, it’s worth exploring. Self-doubt is often learned from navigating a world that wasn’t designed for your brain. 

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